Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Farewell Teamwork

My ex husband often says "I'm not here to make your life easy" when I ask him (for example) if he can look after our son when I have an unanticipated or late meeting at work.

I just took this as churlishness. Inappropriate perhaps, but none the less a valid position.

One of the tenets of our final counselling sessions was that we would work on one thing together, what is best for our son, and leaving him with a string scantily qualified care givers is not.

So often I have thought that rather than "not making my life easy", he is actually making my life difficult.

This morning, I was considering how I would cover these unscheduled events this year, and it crossed my mind to ask my partner if he could step in, and it certainly isn't his job. ...

And this is where something about marriage dawned on me. In Marriage, you are there to make the other person's life easy, and to work as a team. In fact if both parties do everything in their power to ensure the other's happiness, that is one secret of a happy marriage.

And when the marriage is over, that is the first thing to go...

2 comments:

Vic said...

But of course we both know (and your ex doesn't) that your child's welfare is more important than any petty emotions he wants to throw into the equation.

You sound like you have your head together. This is a tough time in the best of circumstances, but by hook or crook you are managing to soldier through.

FI0NA said...

Just read this one. Still wading through clutter physical and emotional